Kid Rock's "All Summer Long" Is a Terrible, Terrible Song

This is just a followup to my Twitter item on the subject, but I heard the new Kid Rock song on the radio tonight. It's apparently called All Summer Long, and it's also apparently really, really awful.

One might think that a song that mashes up Sweet Home Alabama and Werewolves of London would at least have some humor value associated with it, but the song just plods along, and has some of the worst rhymes I've ever heard.

The song nominally uses an AAB rhyme scheme. But the very first line is problematic:

It was 1989, my thoughts were short, my hair was long.

There's supposed to be a rhyme in there somewhere, but I'll be damned if I can find it. So the song starts grating from the very beginning.

The second verse also tries to rhyme "sand bar" with "campfire," but that's barely even worth mentioning here.

Then we get to the chorus; here's the AA rhyme:

And we were trying different things
We were smoking funny things

Yes, a self-rhyme is still technically a rhyme. But it's really grating. And it's also terribly grating.

And of course, it's in the chorus, which means we get to hear it two more times.

Naturally, the song, as terrible as it is, will be a big hit (possibly achieving "song of summer 2008" status), since there's a WWE tie-in and a bunch of bikini girls in the video (I refuse to embed it).

Finally, just to be clear: I don't begrudge Kid Rock his crossover chart success. Picture was kind of schmaltzy but relatively inoffensive -- it was basically his spiritual cover of Islands in the Stream. But this song is just awful.

Tags: kid rock, all summer long